


"Friends"

by lostin_space



Series: quick little doodles [32]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Communication, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Prompt Fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2021-01-02 05:31:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21156419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostin_space/pseuds/lostin_space
Summary: “Yeah, but we didn’t even do that much talking. I wanna talk, I wanna start over, I wanna… I don’t know, I wanna… be friends?”“Friends?” Michael echoed before he could stop himself. Alex licked his lips.“Or something, yeah.”





	"Friends"

**Author's Note:**

> trope prompt fill #36: friends with benefits where both parties catch feelings

“What d'you wanna say, Alex?”

“That I loved you.”

Michael froze. He mulled over that word: _loved_. Past tense. Past tense. Past tense.

“And I think that you loved me too.” Michael knew at least that one should’ve been present tense. He didn’t have it in him to correct him. “For a long time.” Well, at least that much was true.

“Yeah,” Michael agreed, but it didn’t put relief on Alex’s face and therefore didn’t help Michael in anyway. 

“But we didn’t even know each other that well, did we? We just, we connected like something–”

“Cosmic.”

“Yeah, but we didn’t even do that much talking. I wanna talk, I wanna start over, I wanna… I don’t know, I wanna… be friends?”

“Friends?” Michael echoed before he could stop himself. Alex licked his lips.

“Or something, yeah.”

Michael didn’t know what to say to that. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to be just friends with Alex. You weren’t supposed to feel the impulsive need to touch your friends. You weren’t supposed to daydream about kissing them. You weren’t supposed to crave them like their body was an extension of your own and it was physically painful not to be attached.

He shook his head. “_Friends_." 

"I want to know you, Guerin.”

“Really?” Michael scoffed, shaking his head, “Sounds like you wanna go backwards and forget that scary little word.” Alex scowled even harsher somehow. It was what Michael wanted, but it still felt like a punch in the gut.

“Getting to know you isn’t backwards!” Alex proclaimed, stepping closer, “What we had wasn’t real, it wasn’t certain, it was flimsy and purely fueled by, like, instinct. I want to know you, I don’t want just sex and confusion. I want everything and you’re making me repeat myself which is a real pain in the ass." 

Michael tilted his head back and scanned Alex’s face. He wanted to talk like friends, but it followed it by just confirming that being together was instinctual. Man, could he be more confusing? 

"I don’t understand what you want from me,” Michael admitted. He hated admitting that and he usually would keep it to himself and try to figure it out on his own, but he was tired of being Alex-less. He was at the end of his rope and he’d pretty much lost all hope in getting him back. He had nothing to lose, so he asked.

Alex’s eyes widened in disbelief and he looked like he was about to scream, but instead he breathed slow and closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, they were an unmatched level of determination.

“I want to be with you, but we aren’t in a place where that’s a logical decision. I think we need to start from square one and work up to it. We have so many things happening and a relationship starting in this, this bullshit we have isn’t going to work. I want to talk to you and see if we’re even compatible in the first place,” he said as clearly as possible. Michael eyed him.

“And what if we’re not? What if we’re only good together in bed?” That was a scary thought. He was in love with Alex to the point it hurt. He wanted security. Well, he wanted that in more than just Alex, but he wanted at least somewhere. Alex seemed like the safest place to ask for it.

“Then we’ll figure it out.”

“What does that mean?” Michael prodded, “That we’ll still fuck even if we don’t like each other as people?” Alex rolled his eyes, but it was a necessary question.

Michael knew deep in his soul that there was nothing Alex could say or do that would make him not like him as a person. He also knew that Alex would probably hate whoever he found inside Michael.

“I’m serious. I need to know if I shouldn’t get my hopes up.”

Alex smiled and took another step closer, leaving barely a few inches between them. Michael’s fingers itched to touch him, but kept his hands to himself.

“Are you asking to be friends with benefits?” Alex asked. Michael shrugged. He’d take what could get, especially if there was a quiet promise of _forever_ in the cards.

Alex reached up and grabbed his chin, placing a kiss on his lips as if to say _yes_ or _maybe_ or _please be patient_. Whichever it was, Michael took it with pleasure and held it close.

“Bring Maria her necklace back and, please, don’t do it again,” Alex whispered. It wasn’t desperate or angry or even really jealous. It was just Alex’s nice way of saying don’t fuck this up.

He wasn’t going to.


End file.
